I have been contacted by quite a few of this blog's readers...considering my 2 month writing sabbatical I don't know if I still have readers...but alas, before I dropped off the blogging world I was getting all sorts of emails and messages and notes and thoughts and critiques and suggestions and even a few prayers.
Some were awesome "you lift me up" Gosh Groban style
So I just stopped writing.
And then I slipped deeper into the depression in which I dwell on a daily basis.
I started to blog several times but couldn't get past the first line. My mind was blank.
And ate hot dogs.
And thought about all of the "awesome" LDS guys who will never date me because I'm a smart ass who loves to swear and be negative, and openly talks about trials of faith, and takes pole dancing lessons, and sometimes drinks Crystal Light straight out of the pitcher.
And I've thought about the non-LDS guys who will never date me simply because I'm LDS.
So basically I've done a lot of thinking about how being me makes me totally and completely unlovable.
And who wants to read a blog post about that?
I didn't write even when my friend sent me a text message telling me that the bishop of her ward pronounced from the pulpit that "everyone (was) called to date". CALLED TO DATE folks! As in "GOD IS TELLING ME TO TELL YOU to get your asses off the couch and make some Friday night plans". Oh how I wish I'd been there. I would have thrown a shoe at him. I would have. And then as the priesthood leaders were dragging me out I would have whipped off my panty hose and screamed from my foaming mouth "kill me now" in Latin to further protest his statement.
But I just couldn't write.
I didn't even write when my friend sent me a text telling me about dating the douchiest LDS douche of Doucheville.
I thought about it.
But I just couldn't do it.
And no, I will not leave the church, so haters stop hating
And no, I will not tone it down, so haters stop praying and asking me to.
And to KarKar: